Do you know what an alter-ego is?
It means there's a crazy S.O.B. living in your body and you have to give birth to the bastard out in the physical world or else all that crap the S.O.B. says in your head swirls around in your system and jams you up something fierce and then you go on a rampage and either harm a bunch of innocent rabbits and/or eat way too many donuts.
At least, that's Webster's definition of alter-ego.
Many people have had alter-egos over the years--
David Bowie had Ziggy Stardust.
Garth Brooks had Chris Gaines.
And Courtney Love has herself.
I've written before that I have an alter-ego called The Dotman.
The Dotman looks like this---
I had kept The Dotman locked away for quite some time. (And for very good reason. The Dotman is weird, dude!)
But recently, thanks to a moronic (albeit, rather attractive) mediator by the name of Doug,
The Dotman has been given clearance to live his own life and pursue his inane brand of comedy.
The Dotman even started his own MySpace Page on Sunday. (DO NOT be his friend. The Dotman is a whore.) He says the world needs to know about his "genius comedy" or something like that.
And even though he only started his page 2 days ago, The Dotman already has 326 friends. He's been rubbing it in, too. He says that I've been on MySpace since 2004, but I only have 338 friends. I told The Dotman this isn't some kind of competition and besides, have you SEEN the people on The Dotman's page??
He's adding people like Tommy Lee and The Suicide Girls! He doesn't even KNOW those people! And you know how there are the real slutty porno-looking chicks who spam people to be their friend? Well, The Dotman adds them, too! Talk about Smut Central!!
The Dotman says he's going to have over 2,000 MySpace "friends" by the end of this year. I guess it's nice to have goals, but personally I'm not sure I'd want to be The Dotman's friend. I only accepted his friend request because Doug (see above picture) said I had to or else The Dotman can sue me or something.
But whatev. At least The Dotman has his own outlet to do his Dotman thing. Maybe he'll leave me alone finally.
I doubt he will, though.
ON THIS GREAT DAY, AUGUST 21, 2007, DOTSON SALUTES ALTER-EGOS FOR BEING CRAZY S.O.B.S THAT YOU HAVE TO GIVE BIRTH TO SO YOU DON'T HARM RABBITS AND/OR EAT WAY TOO MANY DONUTS, FOR BEING RAVENOUS "FRIEND-ADDERS" ON MYSPACE, FOR BEING OBNOXIOUS IN GENERAL, AND FOR HOPEFULLY LEAVING ME ALONE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE.
What do they call it if your alter-ego has an alter-ego?
I smell a joke coming on... Damn you, Dotman!!!!!
The Dotman's Dumb-Ass Joke of the Day
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